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8 reasons why I coach #2 leadership

This Autumn sees Victoria Smith-Murphy and I launch the 2iC Leadership development experience into fast growing entrepreneurial businesses. We're really curious to see what response it gets; and how it will hopefully build and develop over the coming year. As it's a bit nerve-wracking doing something new, I've been reflecting on my top reasons for why I love coaching the #2 position & what's behind the development of the offer (good coaching tip - when self-doubt creeps in...

'Be who you are'... the myth of Authentic Leadership

At one very low point of my own personal journey of leadership development, I remember sobbing over and over again... "I just want to be me". But it wasn't that simple and here's why... At the same time as crying those words out, I also knew deep down that I was becoming more than I had been. I'd just never expected that letting go of my identity of 'who I was' in order to allow the more expansive and refreshed version of me would be so challenging! And it's also why I get a

Invest in your Co-Founder partnership, not just your business

Over the last year I’ve been noticing where entrepreneurs spend their time and money and it strikes me that Co-Founders of start-ups and their investors seem to be missing out on protecting and developing a core business asset.... the Co-Founder partnership. The quality and dynamic of this relationship holds a critical key to building a sustainable venture and investing in it early could help minimise the likelihood of a third of start-ups failing from people related issues (

Honouring our connection (and our individuality)

This is the twelfth and final in this series of posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others and what's going on in our lives. Something has literally fallen into place in my mind in the last 24 hours: it's AND not OR. It’s my birthday this week and as a little celebration I headed over to New York last weekend to catch up with a friend who is dear to my heart. I was last there in 2011 so it was my first opportunity to

What has been left unspoken, but still said?

This is the eleventh and penultimate in the series of twelve posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others and what's going on in our lives. It's not only been a significant and historic week for the US and the world, but it's also been a week of re-orientation of relationships. I realise that as I write the title for this week’s post, that it is also relevant to this series of posts about relational learning. As this is

In, out or on the boundary of the relationship?

This is the tenth in the series of posts (aiming for twelve!) about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others and what's going on in our lives. This week follows on from the theme of the last two weeks, with attention turned towards the quality of our relationships & our position within them. I recently got given some great advice about networking: you’ve got to make sure that you’re in the right room. In other words, make sure

Part 2: Time, task, relationship... which comes first for you?

This is the ninth in the series of posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others and what's going on in our lives. This week, I'm offering up an activity to turn the attention towards your relationships. Click here to read Part 1. Last week I looked at how time and task can affect our relationships. I’m going to continue with the same theme this week, as I’ve been hearing these sort of question/statements from people tha

Time, task, relationship... which comes first for you?

This is the eighth in the series of posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others and what's going on in our lives. This week, I'm exploring how time and task can affect our relationships. The spaciousness of time seems to be elusive for many people I meet at the moment and I wonder what this does to our relationships? It’s raised the question, what is getting our ATTENTION? The relationship, time or task? Prompted by co

Do I belong here?

This is the seventh in the series of posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others and what's going on in our lives. This week, I'm picking up the theme of 'belonging' which comes from depth in our relationships. I’m in a room full of people looking purposeful, moving about looking like they know what they are doing. I want to join them, I believe I can add value. The only problem is, a solid, sound proof glass wall seem

How intentional are you?

This is the sixth in the series of posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others and what's going on in our lives. This week, I'm reflecting on how I'm learning and experimenting with writing these posts. WOW! I’ve got to week 6 of writing these posts and I’m amazed that it’s taken this long for me to get bored! One of the reasons for writing a regular weekly post was to experiment with my boredom. I love doing the ‘new’

Who are you...really?

This is the fifth in the series of posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others. This week, I'm reflecting on a couple of questions that I was asked last week. Click for posts one, two, three and four. This question was asked of me last week, to share my answer amongst a group of people I’d never met before and it’s lingered with me, partly because at the end of the day, I was also asked if I’d been able to be myself? I

Let's go fly a kite!

This is the fourth in the series of posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others. This week, I'm shifting the attention to the 'depth' of our relationships and how we choose to participate affects us. Click for posts one, two and three. This week I was gifted the image of a kite, blowing in the wind, connected by almost invisible nylon to a person on the ground. It was given to me in response to a question I was posing

Learning through inaction and distraction

This is the third in the series of posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others. This week, I'm exploring my relationship to something other than a person - inaction and distraction. Click for posts one and two. This week’s writing is feeling difficult. I can’t seem to find the words or flow to create a coherent message. I’ve written a number of paragraphs but can’t work out how to join them together. The good news is t

How Relational Learning shows you what you value in life

This is the second in the series of posts about ‘relational learning’; how we learn about ourselves through our relationships with others. This week, I'm exploring how it helps us understand what we value in life. Over the weekend, a friend George, who has recently moved to Spain, sat with his hands over his face and whispered, "they're coming to stay for two weeks and they're not hiring a car!" Whilst he was looking forward to enjoying time with these friends, the idea of be

Introduction to Relational Learning

Between now and Christmas, I intend to share 12 short posts, one per week, around the subject of ‘relational learning’ as a leadership practice. My starting point for doing this is rather selfish, in that it gives me an opportunity to: learn about myself through my relationship with writing improve my skill in how I bring the concept of ‘relational learning’ to life Whilst it’s a learning opportunity for me, I hope it shares some ideas and questions around relational learning

Why uncover your Inner Leader?

Like a tree trunk, your inner leader gives you strength and guidance in how to stand tall in your whole self and spread the reach of your leadership. When we are in alignment with our values, life is lived with balance and authenticity. "Living up to an image you have of yourself or that others have of you is inauthentic living." The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle Why is this important? Our behaviours and actions arise out of our values, so when our values are out of kilter with

Want to avoid the chameleon effect on new recruits?

What are you recruiting for? A cultural fit into the team or something different to bring about change? If it's the latter, are you ready for the change your new recruit will bring now and later on down the line? In my experience as a coach, team player and leader, it is one thing knowing that you need something to change and another being prepared to embark on the journey of letting go of the current and making the transition towards the new. To expect one person to come in

How do you describe what you do?

When I get asked what I do and I respond that I am a Leadership Coach, it can create a bit of a blank look. Sometimes, there is a guess as to what it entails, on other occasions I offer more detail. I'm currently experimenting with the following response to see if it has more clarity and leads to further questions: "I support individuals and groups to develop their individual and collective capacity for leadership in complex and uncertain situations. I believe that by experim

How deep is a virtual connection?

Can a virtual connection go as deep as a face to face connection? Over the last couple of months I have been experimenting with increasing connecting with contacts virtually instead of face to face. Partly, it's born out of practical requirements. Let's be clear it saves a lot of time if you don't work in the same location as your work colleagues. I also wanted to test some of my assumptions that a virtual connection is not as deep as meeting someone face to face. For example

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~ bend the river

Search By Tags

Blog & News

8 reasons why I coach #2 leadership

'Be who you are'... the myth of Authentic Leadership

Invest in your Co-Founder partnership, not just your business

Honouring our connection (and our individuality)

What has been left unspoken, but still said?

In, out or on the boundary of the relationship?

Part 2: Time, task, relationship... which comes first for you?

Time, task, relationship... which comes first for you?

Do I belong here?

How intentional are you?

Who are you...really?

Let's go fly a kite!

Learning through inaction and distraction

How Relational Learning shows you what you value in life

Softening the Goal Mindset

Introduction to Relational Learning

Why uncover your Inner Leader?

Want to avoid the chameleon effect on new recruits?

How do you describe what you do?

How deep is a virtual connection?

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Why ~bend the river?

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